Sometimes... i do feel like I'm dreaming.
like... wow, i'm actually living in Japan, at this moment.
I'm actually here and had been here for half a year. This, is actually happening.
If I hadn't come here, all these would have remain as a dream for me..
The composition that i wrote in summer vacation has a part related to this.
I have translated it for those who want to read.
*PLEASE NOTE* that i translated it from the Japanese that i wrote, not rewriting in my own words so the English might sound weird idk haha
Here goes...
「人はいつか必ず死ぬ」それを知っていますが、何かあるまで、誰でも自分が死ぬとは思いません。しかし、毎日誰も死の可能性があります。今日は絶対に死なないとは言えません。
People will eventually die. Until something happens, nobody actually thinks that they will die even though they are aware of it. However, every day, there is a possibility for anyone to die. No one can confidently say that they will not die today.
今生きていて、いつ死ぬかというとは誰も知らないので、どんなに考えても無駄でしょう。日常生活でいろいろな細かいことに悩んでいて、死について真剣に考える時間がありません。人は毎日通勤通学し、いろいろなことで忙しく、未来や、お金や、友達や、家族など、もっと大切なことを考えます。
We are living right now and we have no idea when we will die, so, isn't it a waste of time to think about death? Everyday, people are busy with their daily life either studying or working, and troubled by various small little things like friends, family, future and money, things that are much more important. Therefore, they wouldn't have time to think deeply about death, right?
その反面、ある状況では、この問題は避けられません。特に病院には、死に直面している人がたくさんいます。病気だけでなく、いろいろな理由で死にたい人もいます。その人たちは、その場合に、一体何を考えているでしょう。
On the other hand, there are situations where people can't avoid not thinking about it. Especially in the hospital, where there are many people who are facing death. Not just for the people who are sick, there are also people around the world for all sorts of reason, doesn't want to live anymore. These people in such situations, what on earth are going through their minds?
生きていく意味はもうなくなり、死にたい人もいる一方で、病気でも一生懸命頑張って生き続けたいと思っている人もいます。死に直面している人はどんな気持ちを持っているか知りたいです。
There are people who want to die because they had lost their purpose in life but there are also people who are sick and suffering yet still struggling to stay alive. I want to know the feelings of these people who are close to death.
死のことを考えたら、自分の人生も真剣に考えます。人は何のために生きているでしょうか。私は最後まで後悔しないで生きていたいです。人は最後には死ぬのですから、自分の人生は自分で決めたいです。健康なうちに好きなことをやって、夢を追いかけたいです。
When you have gave some thoughts about death, you start to think about life seriously. What do you think we living for? For me, I want to live a life without regrets. Since we will have to die anyways, i want to decide my own life, do whatever i want while i still can and chase after my dream.
もし、いつかその目的が達成されても、きっとまた他の意義を見つけられることを信じています。人生で何をしたいかが自分でもわからないと、生きている意味があるのでしょうか。ふらっと暮らしている人は生きていないのと同じだと思いませんか。ですから、みんなはその人生の目的を頑張って探しているのだろうと思います。
Even if one day, I have achieved my goal, I believe there are other purpose in life waiting to be found. If one doesn't even know what he/she wants to do in life, is there any meaning living? Don't you think living a life aimlessly is the same as not living at all? I think that's why every one of us are trying very hard to find our purpose in life.
私も探している途中です。人生の目的は具体的にわかりませんが、やりたいことがあります 。それは日本の生活で様々な経験をすることです。
I am still searching for it too. Even I do not have a clear and concrete goal in life but i have something I want to do. That is, to experience living in Japan.
日本に留学する奨学金がもらえるのを知ったのは、母がまだ生きていた時でした。こんな好機が来て、まるで夢のように信じられず、何とも言えない嬉しい気持ちになりましたが、その時母が病気でした。母の状態は悪くて、危険でしたので、私はその気持ちを我慢して、自分が夢を追って日本へ行くかどうか決められませんでした。自分の夢は諦めたくなかったけれども、母のそばにいたかったからです。
The time when I was informed that I could receive the scholarship to study in Japan, my Mother was still alive. For such a good opportunity to come to me, it was unbelievable and totally like a dream to me. I couldn't describe how happy i was, however at that time, my mother's condition was really bad and she was in a dangerous situation. I suppressed the feeling i was holding and i couldn't decide to pursue my dream of coming to Japan or not. Because even if I had to give up my dream, I wanted to stay by my mother's side.
悩んでいるうちに、母がなくなりました。もし、母がまだ生きているなら、私はここに来ていないかもしれません。母は私が日本に来る前に亡くなりました、皮肉にも私はそのために自分の夢を実現させました。それを思うたびに、私は今の生活をもっと頑張りたくなります。母を失望させたくないし、亡くなった母にも私を誇りに感じてほしいからです。
Before I could decide, Mother passed away. If she was still alive, I might not even be here. She passed away before i had to come to Japan, ironically because of that, i was able to realize my own dream. Therefore whenever i thought of this, i got motivated to work even harder. Because I don't want to let her down and even though she's not here anymore, I want her to be proud of me.
人は何のために生きていますか。その問題の答えは時間が経つとともに変わるかもしれませんが、その答えがわかったら、あなたは人生の大きな一歩を踏み出したと思います。
What are people living for? The answer to this question might change as time goes, but if you have it, I think you had already made a big step in life.
like... wow, i'm actually living in Japan, at this moment.
I'm actually here and had been here for half a year. This, is actually happening.
If I hadn't come here, all these would have remain as a dream for me..
The composition that i wrote in summer vacation has a part related to this.
I have translated it for those who want to read.
*PLEASE NOTE* that i translated it from the Japanese that i wrote, not rewriting in my own words so the English might sound weird idk haha
Here goes...
「人はいつか必ず死ぬ」それを知っていますが、何かあるまで、誰でも自分が死ぬとは思いません。しかし、毎日誰も死の可能性があります。今日は絶対に死なないとは言えません。
People will eventually die. Until something happens, nobody actually thinks that they will die even though they are aware of it. However, every day, there is a possibility for anyone to die. No one can confidently say that they will not die today.
今生きていて、いつ死ぬかというとは誰も知らないので、どんなに考えても無駄でしょう。日常生活でいろいろな細かいことに悩んでいて、死について真剣に考える時間がありません。人は毎日通勤通学し、いろいろなことで忙しく、未来や、お金や、友達や、家族など、もっと大切なことを考えます。
We are living right now and we have no idea when we will die, so, isn't it a waste of time to think about death? Everyday, people are busy with their daily life either studying or working, and troubled by various small little things like friends, family, future and money, things that are much more important. Therefore, they wouldn't have time to think deeply about death, right?
その反面、ある状況では、この問題は避けられません。特に病院には、死に直面している人がたくさんいます。病気だけでなく、いろいろな理由で死にたい人もいます。その人たちは、その場合に、一体何を考えているでしょう。
On the other hand, there are situations where people can't avoid not thinking about it. Especially in the hospital, where there are many people who are facing death. Not just for the people who are sick, there are also people around the world for all sorts of reason, doesn't want to live anymore. These people in such situations, what on earth are going through their minds?
生きていく意味はもうなくなり、死にたい人もいる一方で、病気でも一生懸命頑張って生き続けたいと思っている人もいます。死に直面している人はどんな気持ちを持っているか知りたいです。
There are people who want to die because they had lost their purpose in life but there are also people who are sick and suffering yet still struggling to stay alive. I want to know the feelings of these people who are close to death.
死のことを考えたら、自分の人生も真剣に考えます。人は何のために生きているでしょうか。私は最後まで後悔しないで生きていたいです。人は最後には死ぬのですから、自分の人生は自分で決めたいです。健康なうちに好きなことをやって、夢を追いかけたいです。
When you have gave some thoughts about death, you start to think about life seriously. What do you think we living for? For me, I want to live a life without regrets. Since we will have to die anyways, i want to decide my own life, do whatever i want while i still can and chase after my dream.
もし、いつかその目的が達成されても、きっとまた他の意義を見つけられることを信じています。人生で何をしたいかが自分でもわからないと、生きている意味があるのでしょうか。ふらっと暮らしている人は生きていないのと同じだと思いませんか。ですから、みんなはその人生の目的を頑張って探しているのだろうと思います。
Even if one day, I have achieved my goal, I believe there are other purpose in life waiting to be found. If one doesn't even know what he/she wants to do in life, is there any meaning living? Don't you think living a life aimlessly is the same as not living at all? I think that's why every one of us are trying very hard to find our purpose in life.
私も探している途中です。人生の目的は具体的にわかりませんが、やりたいことがあります 。それは日本の生活で様々な経験をすることです。
I am still searching for it too. Even I do not have a clear and concrete goal in life but i have something I want to do. That is, to experience living in Japan.
日本に留学する奨学金がもらえるのを知ったのは、母がまだ生きていた時でした。こんな好機が来て、まるで夢のように信じられず、何とも言えない嬉しい気持ちになりましたが、その時母が病気でした。母の状態は悪くて、危険でしたので、私はその気持ちを我慢して、自分が夢を追って日本へ行くかどうか決められませんでした。自分の夢は諦めたくなかったけれども、母のそばにいたかったからです。
The time when I was informed that I could receive the scholarship to study in Japan, my Mother was still alive. For such a good opportunity to come to me, it was unbelievable and totally like a dream to me. I couldn't describe how happy i was, however at that time, my mother's condition was really bad and she was in a dangerous situation. I suppressed the feeling i was holding and i couldn't decide to pursue my dream of coming to Japan or not. Because even if I had to give up my dream, I wanted to stay by my mother's side.
悩んでいるうちに、母がなくなりました。もし、母がまだ生きているなら、私はここに来ていないかもしれません。母は私が日本に来る前に亡くなりました、皮肉にも私はそのために自分の夢を実現させました。それを思うたびに、私は今の生活をもっと頑張りたくなります。母を失望させたくないし、亡くなった母にも私を誇りに感じてほしいからです。
Before I could decide, Mother passed away. If she was still alive, I might not even be here. She passed away before i had to come to Japan, ironically because of that, i was able to realize my own dream. Therefore whenever i thought of this, i got motivated to work even harder. Because I don't want to let her down and even though she's not here anymore, I want her to be proud of me.
人は何のために生きていますか。その問題の答えは時間が経つとともに変わるかもしれませんが、その答えがわかったら、あなたは人生の大きな一歩を踏み出したと思います。
What are people living for? The answer to this question might change as time goes, but if you have it, I think you had already made a big step in life.